just when you thought i was normal...

days like today i think i might be a sociopath..."look at me,do i care?" other feelings through out the day mainly towards everyone that trys to make contact with me...dont talk to me. now why would i act like this when the rest of the time i am perfectly content with faking a smile towards any on looker...well i didnt say i had it all figured out. but just a warning...ill fake that smile and youll follow me right in....

un called for!

so i was standing in my kitchen just now making cookies. the kitchen window was slightly open through which i heard a moo-ing sound. first thought...are there cows around here? 2nd thought...omg! someone is watching me make cookies and making obscene cow noises at me! 3rd thought...my neices joke-what do cows say when they go backwards? oom oom. haha cracks me up every time but it wasnt enough to console me. so i went into sieannes room and told her about the incident. she stared at me in disbelief and reminded of the cow pasture not too far from our house. oh im glad someone knows the farm life that lives around here:)

all stars lead to a broken heart.

so im home! it feels good to have all my stuff back here. i am going to dc on wednesday to help with babies. i am def excited. i have loved meeting athalie. she is friggin adorable. and really a good baby. i am excited to go out to dc and start over pretty much. well see how things go. then i will be back home for the summer. i really dont know what i am up to really. i might move back to dc after the summer or back to slc. i really have no passion to stay here in arkansas. i love spending time with my family! but this city just doesnt do it for me anymore. uggg i obviously love making these decisions because i put myself in these situations all the time for sure. yep yep well i will enjoy a few more day shere then off to dc. i must get used to no sleep!

ask me what its like to have myself so figured out...

so i get to go hang out with all the cool people in park city. im excited. perhaps i will land on E! in the background of an actual big star. ooooo. the thing i love most about sundance is that everyone is there just to chill. note to self. must work at sundance before i die. hmmm perhaps i should lower that timeframe a bit....within the next 5 years. idk where ill be in life by then but i will make it back before then. well new year, a month has already passed and you are already kicking my ass. school and work and work and school. new equation. minus a job and add in a social life.

ive realized i need to add a few hobbies into my life so when i actually find myself on my day off and out of school i will be able to function properly. my social life needs to improve so i can find a cute guy and not freak out in my normal style. must keep it cool. im sure there is a manual i need to read that will instruct me in these ways.

off to find out how live my life. tootles.